From the Collection of Pat Young

A lady having lunch at the house of a friend praised a sauce that was served and was given permission afterward to ask the cook for the recipe. The cook said she didn’t have the recipe - just worked things out as she went along. The usual ingredients, though, were butter, flour, lemon juice, a few shakes of paprika, and water. The lady wanted to know how much water.

“Oh, just a mouthful.” A man boarded a streetcar without any pants. Police who arrested him asked why he was riding around on a street car on Tuesday morning without any pants.

“Tuesday,” the bewildered man marveled. “I thought it was Monday.”

Chuck: “What’s up, Joe? You look troubled.” Joe: “Yeah! I’m going to be a father.” Chuck: “Congratulations. But what is so terrible about that?”

Joe: “Nothing, except my wife doesn’t know it yet.” The noise of an all-night poker game in the next hotel room kept a tired tourist from sleeping. At 3 a.m. he started to pound on the wall hoping to silence the revelers.

“Hey,” shouted one of the gamblers, “this is a hell of a time to be hanging pictures.”