“That’s the pot calling the kettle black” is an old fashioned saying that probably dates me. While it has Spanish origins, it began being used in English in the 17th Century. No, I am not that old, but I am familiar with the idiom. The saying is used to convey judgements that a person makes toward someone else that could be applied to himself or herself.

A Bible verse that is centuries older than that comes from Matthew 7:5, “You hypocrite! First take the beam out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.” I think this fits with the theme of recent commercials I’ve seen about Jesus that say, “He gets us.”

A more child-like version states, “When you point your finger, there are three fingers pointing back at you.” Although this is said to have Navajo roots, I first learned it on the school playground.

So, I find it interesting that the biggest lesson I am learning in my 50th year of life is not new.

While I’d like to pride myself in being open-minded, loving and accepting when it comes to diversity in cultural, religious and political views, I can honestly admit I find myself being judgemental in even the smallest aspects of life. The harsher reality is that very few qualities that I judge in others have not also been present inside of myself.

When I judge another for their approach to hurt and pain, I see my own choices born out of hurt and pain. As I criticize a co-worker for his or her process or style, I remember how I too have not always gotten it right and struggled to learn. And, I notice my own awareness of the disapproval of others when I pass along disapproval to those around me. Each circumstance is a mirror reflecting back my own image to myself.

Because of this, I choose to renew my resolution. I continue to pray, “Above all, I want to see differently.” I will remember what a valued friend once taught me: I am no better or worse than any of God’s kids. And, when I notice I’m the pot, I will turn toward acceptance and allow the kettle to be black without judgment.